Love My Job

Snow peppered the ground last night and this morning making a nice blanket of white for worship today, though nothing like the snow that has covered the fire hydrant back in DC where my family are. Still we had a good crowd for both of my services today. And the music was outstanding.

I love my job. I had two TDYs this week - one to Kwanju to participate in a memorial service and the other to Daegu for visitation and ministry. Korea continues to amaze me at its beauty. I was reminded in many places of south east Kentucky as we traveled the highways south.

Christmas Eve Worship is looking to be something special as we are bringing in a brass ensemble as well as adding some great music by our own choir. My bosses talented daughters will also be with us.

Speaking of talent, or lack thereof, I was grabbed by members of the PACAF band who were performing in the BX to "play" with them. The instrument of choice: reindeer bells. I was never much one for percussion so who would have ever guessed my debut with the AF band would be on percussion. That's what I get for telling the rest of the brass ensemble that French Horns are the best instrument in the band!

They are by the way! Horns Rock!
Anyway, Christmas Eve is going to be a big production for a number of reasons. Am looking forward to it.

But as I said, I love my job. Sometimes you have to work your tail off, but it is the kind of work that you love doing. In my visitation with my airmen out in Korea I had several opportunities for heart to heart conversation on all kinds of topics. A couple of times people asked me why I would want to be an Air Force chaplain. That is easy. I get to be part of the lives of some of the most hard working, interesting, dedicated, inspiring, intelligent and caring people I have ever known. They invite me into their lives and in times of tragedy I cry with them and in times of joy I laugh with them (and sometimes get laughed at like when I am corralled into getting out on the dance floor - this old guy can't dance.) I am looking forward to getting home though.

My little girl sent me a homemade Christmas card. She told me Christmas would not be the same without me home and then on the back she said she wished all my dreams would come true. Well one won't because I can't be in two places at once, -- but one should -- I'll be home in a month to hug my girls close. But leaving them again will be hard, I suspect harder than the first time.

Off to the gym. That is my major relaxation activity when time permits.

Please look

The experience of serving at Arlington National Cemetery has touched and continues to touch my soul.

Please take a look at these photos: look, remember, and pray.

"Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those who have his good will!"
Luke 2:14

Wow!

Being as busy as I tend to be these days, the opportunity to catch up more than just a quick survey of the news doesn't come too often. I was aware that some Americans were detained in Pakistan for ties with terrorism, but I was surprised to read this morning that all five are from right in my neighborhood in Alexandria. This is where my family and where my kids go to school for goodness sake! We are only minutes from the Pentagon, the entire Capitol complex, and places like Arlington Cemetery where visitors come and go with little security screening. It would be easy for terrorists to blend into the population there in Alexandria as it is a very diverse population and just about anyone can blend in. I don't envy the job of our law enforcement folks there, but I am thankful for them and for the work that so many do to keep our people safe from those who think God wants them to kill Americans.

Here is the story I was reading:

Fun

Great fun yesterday for the Pearl. S. Buck Party. Had around 100 folks in for the party. Lots of stuff. I planned out and organized the program. We had organized games and a huge bounce castle, which I had to check (when no one was around to see) to confirm it was safe and operational ;) Then we had a great traditional American and Korean lunch with Turkey and Bulgogi and Kimchee. The we had a very sweet young lady play the viola, a bunch of translators who did a skit with the shepherds telling the story (and they really got into it), then Christmas carols lead by my boss who also really got into it and did a great job -- had all the Korean children on stage singing carols in Hangul (Korean), and finally we told the story the Night Before Christmas in Hangul followed by a visit by an extra special Santa who passed out the many gifts donated by the folks here at the Osan chapel community.

Today I will be missing participating in a ritual I've done the past few years. Today they are laying wreaths at Arlington.

Pictures

"Mountains, Gandalf, I want to see mountains and find a quiet place to finish my book." - Bilbo Baggins

I truly enjoy pictures. At the end of a long day, or sometimes series of days, I find relaxation in visiting a couple of sites of photographers from back home in TN. I also enjoy hitting the webcams in the Smokey's. I've seen some astounding photos like the ones here. The mountains have always brought me a sense of peace and fulfillment. Mountains are places of quiet reflection and inner healing. They are places of rest.

So I am looking forward in a little over a month spending some time on a mountain top somewhere, even if it will be winter and cold. I'm tired to tell the truth. Lots of long days. And rather than the need growing less, as I get to know my folks better and they me, I find more opportunities and more things that need doing.

I spent several days this week away down south ministering to some special folks who lost a dear friend. This is exactly the kind of ministry that I came into the Air Force to do. Some days though, I find myself having to weigh the requests and needs and having to tell some folks later or even sometimes no. If I could have anything for Christmas it would be 36 hour days. I did decide tonight to knock off at 1900 because I need some rest. Today we spent a great deal of time in an exercise, but I was able to get a bunch of stuff done even though, which is a good thing. I will be full up from now until Christmas Day. Next week I'll be out and about into Korea for a large portion of the week. This Saturday will be great fun as we bring a bunch of kids to base for a special Christmas party. I really enjoy doing programs like this for the orphans.

But back to my trip to Kwangju (or Gwangju as some spell it). No photos from there this time. It was a rapid notice departure and I didn't have time to grab my camera. I wouldn't have had anythign except I keep a bag ready to go. I did stay at a local hotel (very nice by the way) rather than on base for various reasons and so experienced a part of the city I didn't see last time I was down. Kwangju reminds me of an other developed American city, except I don't understand the language well. Some things are very Korean though.

Entering the room I notice two pair of slippers (Koreans usually do not wear shoes inside the house and a pair of clogs for the bathroom.) The toilet was very state of the art - and I didn't figure it out. It had a control console. The buttons were labeled as to function -- in Korean! So when it came time to have it do what toilets do, I started pushing buttons. The toilet seat rose and lowered, vibrated, heated up, squirted at me -but other than that - making no progress. Finally I see a traditional but very small and tucked away on the back handle for that nice royal flush. I think I need to learn a bit more Korean.

My little girl (my oldest, but I still think of her as my little girl) made me some incredible chocolate coconut cookies, which I grudgenly shared with the office (after I tucked away half the container). They are gone (except for a few I have kept for Christmas day). And my little bit made me some trail mix all by herself. That is about 1/2 gone too. Suffice it to say my diet has suffered just a bit.

Oh, and if you have been following my previous posts - I found them hard to spot and easy to hide elves. Actually corned couple of young ladies into serving for me - and thanks to my wife they even have green and red stocking to wear. (I'm am really glad I got volunteers because my fall back plan was me and I didn't even want to imaging wearing green and red stockings.) Have a bunch of volunteers from linguists to parents to watch over the kids play time, to an airman doing organized games, to a Red Cross rep and his wife serving as the Claus family. There are a great bunch of folks here at Osan. Truly they are a joy to work with.

End Game

As a chaplain I have many opportunities to provide counseling to the people I serve with. Some folks just need someone to bounce an idea off of or need another set of eyes on a problem. Other folks come and talk to me several times as we together engage to bring growth and healing to their lives.

In my divorce recovery group tonight we discussed how to know when it is time to get into another relationship and what are some of the flags that might warn you away from a potential partner. The idea of dating someone in therapy came up to which I shared this idea: most people would benefit at some point in their from seeing a counselor - that is to engage in a deliberate process to develop oneself that is therapeutic (healing). Why? Because we are a fallen human race, we are not perfect, we all make mistakes, and we could all benefit from character and personal development.

That said though, I often share with my counselees that real in-depth self-examination and profound character development can be hard. Many people come to see me because they are hurting and they want to stop hurting. But there are lots of ways you can stop when the struggle is very difficult.

You can quit. Or you can win. Both are ways to stop a difficult struggle. I remember when I started trying to loose weight over twenty years ago now, it got very hard. I missed snacks. I missed sweets. It was hard when I saw other people eating stuff I wanted to. And I was hungry, in real physical pain and discomfort. And I had such a long way to go, starting at 320 pounds. And truth be told, I was a quitter. I had tried to loose more than once. But this time, I had some encouraging circumstances and a bit more maturity and had developed a bit more personal drive and self-discipline. This time I was determined to win. Today I weight 164.

Life is hard. The divorce care program I lead says as one of its tag lines "because life isn't sugar coated". Real life can be hard. But it can also be wonderful. Life can be a struggle. To match our potential is not easy. But when faced with a struggle - you may find yourself asking - will I quit or will I win.

Sometimes quitting can be fatal. I have someone in the family very close to me who fought off lung cancer but only need to quit smoking to probably have many more years. But in that struggle they quit. And the cancer has returned. I've talked with folks who life has beaten up on and they can't see a way past the pain and for them they are close to the ultimate quit. Sometimes to quit a struggle is suicide. Ending can never be the ultimate goal. I always encourage people to see the ultimate goal as victory over adversity.

Sometimes you have two choices - give up or push through. One of the reasons I am a chaplain is because I want to encourage folks to push through. Life can be incredible on the back side of some amazing struggles. And I don't want to ever give evil or the devil an easy win, and that's what we do when we give up and quit whether in be in a personal life or any other level of life. I like systems theory because I see so many things that work a certain way for individuals and couples, also work for organizations, society, and beyond. What's really cool about my divorce care group, is that together they pool their wisdom and their energy to help each other carry through to healing and renewal.

Rocky said it well: "It's not about how hard you hit, but how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done."

Fed and Watered

My wife asked me this morning if I was able to have Thanksgiving Dinner yesterday? I can truly say I have been well fed and watered the past few days. Wednesday I had three events and Thursday I had two.

They were all a great deal of fun as well as it was a chance to rub shoulders with most of the airmen I am caring for in a more relaxed atmosphere than usual. Got to try some great food as well as the traditional favorites. Had some very good ham and some incredible pumpkin bread as well.

Last night, the 25th had so much food left over, that I and a couple of pilots and one of the pilot's wives made a major food run to the fire hall and then out to the army personnel who were standing watch last night. Visitation, especially on holidays, is so important for these young men and women who are so far from home and family. Many times their watch places are removed from the center of things and they can feel forgotten. But they are not. As I told one very young army soldier, I sleep better knowing that they are always there taking care of business so the bad guys can't ever sneak in.

Went out and did some Christmas shopping today. Mixed into the mess that is outside the gate there is some very reasonable and high quality shopping. The wise shopper here takes his time, doesn't buy the first one they see, and does their research and asks questions -- how is this made? What is it made out of? Etc...

Actually off today - an entire day - an not on duty either. Tomorrow, I only have to do my sermon. I am relishing the time to relax and catch up on a few personal items.

Green Tights

Green Tights -- gotta have 'em. I'm making elves you see. Yes, I'm a Lord of the Rings fan, connoisseur of the many elves of Middle Earth -- but those ain't the kind I am in need of.

I need the kind that run the pooper scooper behind reindeer, who are really good at editing very long lists and can stand working for someone who is jolly all the time (and I do mean all!).

All in a very cold environment where 1/2 the year the sun doesn't shine.

You see, we have a bunch of kids coming to visit Osan and I need those elves to help pass out gifts.

Elves I got. Tights I don't. So my wife is out and about. If you see a woman carrying green tights around DC -- well now you'll know.

Updates

Time has been very full these last six to eight weeks or so. I realize I haven't written much about what I have been about, largely because I've been so much about that I just haven't had time. It is a rare day that I have a day off and a rare day off that I don't have to do something that day. I haven't done much writing of late. Not here and not on my book I am working on either. Nor have I invested a great deal of time into my photography hobby. I've shot some film, digital that is, but haven't worked many shots. But I did work these up.

The first are shots from the retreat center from last week's trip to Seoul for our "Super Retreat" where we offered seminars on pre-marriage dating relationships, divorce recovery, and spirituality for men. My divorce recover group continues to meet each night on Tuesday evenings and is proving to be great ministry.

The retreat was a welcome break from Osan but was back to a steady trot by Sunday afternoon having to make sure I got all the folks back home and then cleaning up and putting away all the stuff we took to make things happen. I shared some Tennessee chili with them Friday night for dinner and some corn bread, though I must admit it the bread didn't turn out good as it normally does. I think it suffered from my trying to do too many things at once mode.

It was very cold up there, but there was still a bit of fall color. Saturday night I traveled with the boss up to Nam Sang mountain where we took a tram up to the tower in the picture to look out over the city. It was blistering cold and I was thankful for the wool hat I borrowed from my boss.

I've also included a picture of our Pearl S. Buck angel tree. This is a big program where we bring a big bunch of Amerasian orphans to the base for a big Christmas party. I'm organizing the program portion, basically the entertainment. I've talked our Red Cross rep into being Santa. Figured it would fit him since he wears red most of the time anyway.

Finally, there is a picture here, now that the event is over, of Air Force One come to Osan. The President held a local photo shoot meet and greet here but I didn't even try to go. I was off the base getting an MRI. That proved quite the non-adventure in fact. My technician could speak English and we had a shuttle driver that took us to the hospital, walked us in, and then walked us back out. You might call it MRI for dummies. I had to rest a bit after the test with all the junk they fill you up with. But I did make it to our Speghetti dinner the chapel sponsors last night.

Look to be full up right through the Thanksgiving holiday. I have an orphanage trip tomorrow, Sunday I have services and our youth ministry. Monday I have regular office hours and some counseling appointments. Tuesday I have PT at O'dark thirty and full office hours with some more counseling appointments until my divorce care group that evening. Wednesday is normally my "CTO"but we are decorating the chapel so I'll be there. Thursday our staffing is putting on a Turkey Fry (literally - one of the chaplains brought a Turkey fryer) but I"ve been asked to be involved in a major Thanksgiving Celebration the Operations Group is doing so I'll likely wind up over there. Friday I've got an invite to another Squadron event. I'm hoping next Saturday all I'll have to do is my sermon prep for Sunday...and my laundry...and my grocery shopping...etc. Need to get that done some time too.

Osan is a steady marathon - in some ways it is like a race that just never ends. There is always another corner to turn. Time management becomes crucial here, not just to get tasks done, because there is always more to do than you can always do... but you also have to manage time to get personal things done, such as laundry and groceries, but also get enough rest to stay productive. But it can be a challenge and there are days where rest becomes the thing that has to be put aside, at least for that day. Osan is great training ground. You learn for the sake of productivity and survival to make the best use of your time and task management skills. I wish I had more time to be out just visiting and network with my airmen, but even here I find that you have to make sure you can hit alot of bang for the buck (or hour in this case). There are a number of things I really want to do and probably should be done, that I just can't because there isn't enough days in the week. Already my typical week looks like this:

Sunday 0730-1700
Church Services (Liturgical & Traditional)
Youth Group
Monday 0730-1630 it is not uncommon to find the chaplains working late at the chapel. I usually PT after work for a hour or so.
Tuesday 0630-2030
PT
Divorce Care
Private Counseling Appointments
Wednesday (possible day off - depends on chapel and unit requirements)I usually PT at least for a hour or so.
Wednesday nights I do have AWANA to attend

Thursday 0630-1630 (except couple times a month when there are even chapel events - then usually out to about 8 to 8:30pm
PT
Staff Meetings
Speghetti dinner (once per month)
other events (like monthly birthday meal, squadron get togethers etc...)

Friday 0730-1630
PT for an hour after work

Saturday - sermon preparation and once per month Orphanage Trip

Sunday - go around again.

I also make sure I PT on M, W, F, Saturday and often on Sunday for at least an hour to stay in shape.

Mondays and Tuesdays I am usually doing a combination of things during office hours. Working on accomplishing short term tasks or tasks associated with major projects or program areas I am responsible for. Also I do many of my counseling appointments on these days. We also tend to have a number of walk-ins on Mondays and Tuesdays for some reason. Tuesday nights I have my divorce group and usually wind up doing a bit of follow up after the session. Wednesday I try to take off as much as possible, as that is my day off, but we often have chapel events that require all hands on on Wednesdays and I find that often I have squadron events I need to be present for or that there are loose ends that need tied up. For example, this week I had to finalize and drop off a conscientious objector's interview package. I often try to do my laundry and grocery shopping on Wednesday as well as hit the weights a bit harder that day. Wednesday nights I pop over to check on the AWANA program and say hi to the kids and the adults. Thursday after early PT is staff meeting day. Lots of meetings. We do a short chapel stand up then the Protestant chaplains meet in the morning, all the chaplains meet for lunch, then the entire staff meets for the afternoon staff meeting followed by chapel training. Hard to get much accomplished on Thursdays.
Friday is another day I try to work projects and front load my networking for the stuff that is coming the next week. I also try to get out to visit as much as possible on Friday.
Saturday I usually spend the morning working my sermon, a portion of the afternoon at the gym, and then relax the rest of the afternoon and evening because I know that Sunday starts another full week. But sometimes, at least once, sometimes twice, a month I have chapel events on Saturday and so wind up busy during the day and doing my sermon prep that night. Those make for long weeks.

The upshot is this -- time management - both of one's tasks, one's network, one's own rest and spiritual life is essential here. Without it, one could easily burn out here. But it is manageable with the right mindset. I just tell myself to remember the many chances to make a difference in someone's life and when I find myself blessed with some unexpected time to myself I relish it and recharge and then push forward.

Happy Day 2

My youngest got her report card. Gotta brag on her too!

Straight A's.

Way to go little bit!

Oh, and my oldest didn't have a 3.7

It was, as she reminded me,
3.714

HAPPY HAPPY!!!!

3.7

So what is so great about the number 3.7? That's my daughter's GPA after tackling a whole load of honors classes. She's been working very hard and this is just to tell the world that I'm proud of her!

ps. I miss her too!

Beaver days

What do these past few days have to do with beavers? Ever heard of "busy as a beaver". These past few days have been busy. Served the past week as duty chaplain and had a whole bunch of calls. This was probably the busiest duty week that I've had since coming in the Air Force. But these are major opportunities to make a difference in the lives of someone.

One of those was to console someone who had a very tragic event in their lifetime which has been characterized by many high ups and low downs. They shared that God must have a purpose. And it occurred to me that maybe the purpose God has for us in tough times, and even in good times, is to live and serve in the moment. Yes, I believe in being goal and future oriented and aiming to achieve things, but there also comes a point in one's life that you realize that just maybe this is where God wanted you to be so that you can bring your gifts and strengths to bear in the lives of others. Maybe the purpose of this moment is not just to prepare you for future moments but rather the purpose of this moment is service in this moment.

So anyway learned some lessons about myself and the value of pacing. Wound up getting very tired over the past few weeks and having some physical issues resurface that I thought were resolved in DC. So, now I will have a new experience -- finding a Korean hospital on my own for an MRI. In a country where I don't speak the language, I expect it may be a bit of an adventure. I did visit our local ER last night and feel much better after a few liters of fluid. Fill me up please.

You know, getting old is a real pain in the backside. I tease people that I have OAS (old age syndrome) but I find that I can't do as much as I used to. Used to I could get up before dawn and go run or lift for a couple of hours, shower, go to work and work 12 hours or more. There were even times when my job pace allowed it that I would spend 3-5 hours working out hard. But I just can't do it anymore, even if I had the time, and a few weeks of 12-15 hours days has exhausted me. My boss even fussed at me and told me to rest. I hate to admit that I'm slowing down. But it will still be a bit before I can take some solid time off as I have pretty full days for at least another week. But I'm going to be certain I get sleep.

Lots of good stuff going on. I have a good group of solid Lutherans here who are attending my services and I met another who just came to Osan today. Good folks. This weekend I will be with two other chaplains conducting a retreat at a local retreat spot near Seoul. I am starting a "Divorce Recovery" support group. I've also been working on a portion of a very large outreach program to Korean children called Pearl S. Buck. I'm looking forward to this in December. And speaking of things I am looking forward to, Tuesday the chaplains are having lunch with some local ministers just to build relationships. Tomorrow I am making chili and good old fashioned Tennessee mountain cornbread for dinner tomorrow night at the Retreat Center.

Spent about three hours today with our team helping make cookies. The Officer Wive's Club here at Osan makes cookies for every military member in Korea. Our shift prepared about 10,000 in a little less than three hours. Hooah! (We only ate the broken ones... really!)

Found out that I didn't get picked up for a school I was hoping for, a counseling degree in PTSD. So I will be waiting to find out my new assignment sometime in early Spring time. I'm looking forward to going home after the first of the year for 30 days to see my family. I'm trying to find ways to stay involved and busy over the holidays since I really don't want to just sit around my room. I'm tossing around trying to go TDY to the outposts attached to us and doing some services down there since those guys don't see a chaplain too often.

Quiet Reflecting

I had been looking forward to this weekend, but I find myself reflecting on the horrible shooting at Fort Hood. Until last night and today I hadn't had a great deal of time to look at the news stories surrounding the event as we were in full exercise (practice for war) mode here at Osan for the week. Yesterday we were done, but I was feeling pretty poor I think due to getting the H1N1 shot. I don't think I have the actual flu as I don't have a fever, but H1N1 is alive and well in Korea according to what I've heard from Korean news.

Anyway, today I looked more closely at the stories regarding Fort Hood. Many dealing with motivations of the shooter from his job history to his family history to his religious beliefs and how all this may have rolled in and impacted his behavior. Being a systems person I believe all these factors form a complex web of influence that shape our behavior, but we are not machines nor just basic animals running on instinct. We are responsible for our own actions and how we choose to respond to and incorporate the influences that we feel. But that said, the primary impression I was left with as I saw this morning that most of the stories are all about a concern that his religious beliefs will be "overstressed" as a source of his behavior -- I saw something missing in the story. There was a bit about the victims. But nothing - couldn't find one story about all the many folks who I know are out there. Where are the stories about these folks?

The first responders who got to the scene and secured the scene and treated the wounded. The soldiers who I know started using self aid and buddy care techniques we are trained in to help save the lives of the injured. The bases crisis response teams from their security forces who immediately rushed into harms way to protect their fellow soldiers to all those who at a moment's notice shifted from normal ops to critical operations. The medical professionals in the local hospitals who even now continue to fight to save lives. The family members who rushed to the sides of those they love. The family members who are likely taking care of homes and children for others back home so that other family members can reach out. The pastors and their flocks who are surrounding the hurting. The people who are in prayer for the families of the victims and for those who still struggle to live. Where are the stories about the soldiers preparing to deploy and take the fight to the enemy so that incidents like this will not be common in our homeland though we know there are those out there who would love the opportunity to walk into a crowded mall and emulate the actions of Hasan. Yet many of these same soldiers now have lost some of their friends and comrads from their very units. But they will go forth and they will serve putting themselves between our nation and those who would seek to make her bleed. There are people out there who are taking donations and doing anything they can to support the hurting. I wish we had some stories about that.

So rarely do we hear this side of the story. We focus on the pathetic and evil person and how powerful force or forces could turn him into such, and that is a legitimate conversation. Then we focus on not over reacting by equating the evil action of the evil person to people who are like him in some way while also trying to see if perhaps we can learn how something can be a problem and indeed does encourage people to act on evil. But we rarely talk about the positive side -- how people are noble and good and the forces that turn them into such -- how people throw themselves into service at moments like this to care for the hurting, in some cases even throwing themselves into harms way to save a life itself. I know it happened because I know the caliber of the American soldier and I know the caliber of the American military family member and I know that America, wounded though we are and in many ways divided against ourselves, still has a heart beat and the blood of liberty and service and nobility still flows through or veins.

I wish we had more stories about that.