Faith and Fear

2020 is become a year that is testing individuals and society in ways we have not experienced before.  I live in San Antonio.  Early in the Covid pandemic we watched as areas of the country where hit hard like New York City and we gave thanks that it appeared we were being spared.  Infections were few and not spreading in a concerning way.  But after Memorial Day and now July the 4th we cannot say the same in San Antonio.  Last night there were 2,202 new cases reported, the most in a single day pushing us over 30,000 cases 10x the number of just six weeks ago.  Some models from well respect health researchers are indicating the possibility of almost 150,000 infections by the end of August.  When I go out I have noticed that more and more people are wearing masks and being careful and keeping their distance from folks.  Truth is truth and reality is reality.  There is a new disease among us and for some it isn’t much and for others it is a real problem.  And it is a concern for many, a concern I sympathize with as an older person who is not 100% healthy whose doctor has told me that while he can’t know for certain how it would impact me it would be best to not find out.

Fear… what is the Christian’s response to fear or its cousins:  confused, concerned, nervous, anxious, worried, frantic, terrified, hysterical or its give up cousin despair.

Take Joshua 1:9  for instance.  “Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”   Fear is emotional information charged with energy that comes from our brain advising how we should respond to a stimulus that is perceived as a threat.  Now only an irrational person would say Covid isn’t a threat.  So a fear response in the face of Covid is to be honest understandable.  It is not a sign of a weak faith.  So if we are afraid does that mean we don’t believe?  We’ll come back to that.  But listening to Joshua here, he is recognizing a message that fear might say to us:  Run.

Fear originates in what I call the deeper areas of our brain that are less conscious to us.  There is a lot of ruminating that goes on down there that most times we are only vaguely aware of but sometimes when that part of our mind says, ok there is something to pay attention to it will kick a message up in the form of an emotion.  Fear is one of the strongest.  It is like the old TV show Lost in Space with robot suddenly yelling “danger Will Robinson, danger” but you don’t know exactly what.  But deep in your mind when you encounter a stimulus your subconscious is comparing it to what you know, what you have experienced before and asking is this like something we’ve seen before and is it good for us or bad for us.  If it is good for us you may get information flowing up in the form of warm and fuzzy emotions.  If it is dangerous to us, you may very well feel fear.  But the subconscious will send even more emotional information.  It has already in a matter of a split second faster than your consciousness can think evaluated the stimulus now identified as threat and decided what you should do. Flee!  Fight!  Appease!

You see the fear center of our brain is hardwired.  Its part of the design.  It’s a really good thing to have when you are in the woods and you walk around a bend and there is a bear.  That part of your brain will immediately reaction:  danger.  It will assess and recommend– run or fight.  If you can get away run.  If you can kill it fight.  If you can’t do either – play dead.  You might even pass out.  We call that appeasement.

Here Joshua is dealing with the run instinct.  Be strong.  Be courageous.  Don’t run.  Engage.  The Lord is with you.  Don’t pretend the problem doesn’t exist.  Don’t just run away from it.  Be strong.  Be courageous.

Let us hear the words of Jesus Himself.  “…do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.”  This is from the famous Lilly of the Fields passage and where Jesus reveals that God does so much to take care of us that we don’t even know the half of it.  And the message is the all encompassing overwhelming love of God.  

Now worry is a particular kind of fear.  That lingering sense of unease.  It wells up from the warning center in the brain saying there is a problem here (real or perceived –sometimes this part of our brain isn’t as smart as it thinks it is.) and down here in the basement the little problem solving elves don’t really know what to do with it.  We think more bad stuff is coming based on what we know of the past and present but we really don’t know how to fix it.  We don’t know how to run, you probably can’t run.  We don’t know how to fight it.  We are a little concerned you can’t fight it.  We think we are missing something.  All this wells up to our consciousness as a general sense of unease that just won’t go away.  Its like the elves are constantly texting us saying hey, we need your help figuring this out and they won't shut up.

Notice Jesus in the Lilly of the Fields passage doesn’t say there is not a problem.  Notice he also doesn’t say just pretend it will go away.  He does say God loves us.  We have to be honest here. There is no promises in Scripture that God will necessarily protect us from COVID and either keep us from catching it or preserve our life.  He might.  Behind the scenes He may very well.  But God does allow bad things to happen to Christians.  Recently I asked friends and family how many knew people who have Covid.  Most know someone.  Most of these folks identify as Christian.  I know Christian men who have contracted it.  Does that mean that aren’t really Christian? That their faith was deficient?  We know better than that.  We know God loves us because He promises so.  But we also know the fallenness of this world will have its way with us and one day we shall all die.  But because of God’s love we shall know grace and eternal life.

My radar goes up just a bit when I hear preachers proclaim if you have enough faith you won’t get sick and if you are sick it is because you are afraid and don’t believe, don’t trust, you are worrying, doubting. (I feel the same about any promises or demands that supposedly come from God but aren't in the Scripture.)   Years ago I heard a Pentecostal preacher in a chapel service tell his people this.  "If you have enough faith you won't get sick and if you get sick God will heal you."  And I thought to myself, so on their dying bed are they going to think they didn’t have enough faith, a right faith, they were not a Christian after all?  Friends, such thinking is a lie crafted by our enemy the devil.  It isn’t right.

I knew a young lady once, an Army soldier and she was rock star.  Great at her job.  She had a stomach ache that turned out to be widespread cancer.  I visited with her and she was absolutely convinced God was going to miraculously heal her to show people His power.  She got sicker.  Her faith never wavered until her final moments.   She realized God wasn't going to heal her.  Only then was she ready to listen not to all the false messages of comfort she had been given but to the real message of the Gospel as proclaimed in Scripture alone.

Reality is reality.  We live in a fallen sinful world that hurts us regardless of how much and how right or how wrong our faith is.  And the world isn’t fair.  Sometimes good people get hurt and sometimes not so good people come out smelling like a rose.  Scripture doesn’t promise you that if you pray right, if you don’t worry right, if you aren’t afraid right and have great great faith you won’t catch Covid.  There is not such promise.

So should we worry?  Should we linger in fear that leads us to run away or shut down, to quit or to pretend its isn't real?  

Fear sometimes sends another message:   fight.  Do what you can.   Now sometimes fighting is bad like when we think a person is a threat and we act out to harm them to preserve ourselves.  The Bible has a lot to say about that and we’ll talk about this in a little bit.  But when fear runs into a Godly mind you don't hear the message of hurt people or hurt yourself but rather:  “be strong and courageous.”  Jesus tells us we don’t have to get into that nagging fear/worry that saps our power as we focus on what is coming, but notice he doesn’t tell us not to deal with today.  “each day has enough trouble of its own”.   With God in our corner we can be bold and courageous.  God doesn’t say pretend the threat doesn’t exist. God doesn’t say sit around and do nothing.  God says be bold and courageous.  

The interesting thing about the emotions God has given us (think mad, sad, scared, glad) is we often feel lots of things at once like a grand symphony with many voices sometimes soothing, sometimes inspiring, sometimes crashing in discord with rising tempo.  It is not unusual to find love/fear in a dance together.  Fear/faith often dance together.

Because the Bible says a lot from God who loves us to comfort us in our fear so it doesn’t drown us,  many folks assume that faith and fear are polar opposites.  But the reality is more nuanced than that.  Fear serves a valuable function.  Sometimes it is wrong, but it is often right.  There is a reality out there than is dangerous for us.  You need to take some action.  When I was hiking the Appalachian trail and ran into bear by surprise and out of fear began to back away, I doubt anyone would say that was an unreasonable action or a sign of unbelief.  We all know there is not Bible passage that says go up and bonk it on the nose and an angel of the Lord will smite that bear for you.  Fear is an emotional response informing us of our brain’s assessment of a situation.  Faith is a God given gift (Rom 10:17) not earned or created by us (Eph 2:8-9) that informs us about the bigger picture because God is in it.  The information comes from God’s Word, its distinct promises, not the hopes of fantasy people are sometimes prone to create and call faith, like as above, “if you have enough faith God will heal you from every disease”.  Now God may very well do so.  He has sure intervened on my behalf any number of times.  But I still have no doubt that one day I shall die.  And I have no doubt that if I am not cautious but carelessly expose myself to Covid that I will contract this contagious disease.  God has not promised me that I can be reckless and He will protect me. I know of no such Scripture.

Fear and love dance together in the realm of faith.  Luther picked up on this.  We find it in his Small Catechism.  “Thou Shalt have no other gods.  What does this mean?   We should fear, love and trust in God above all things.”  Hmmm… fear, love, trust.   How about that?   Of course we understand this is a right kind of fear with a right and reasonable reaction.  It is not the fear that runs away as Adam and Eve did in the Garden seeking to ignore and hide from the truth. It is not the fear of the Pharisess who fearing Jesus sought to remove Him from the equation to protect themselves and their people.   It is a fear that recognizes reality, the real danger, and the real consequences of that danger. We live in a fallen world.  We have sinned.  We brought all this on ourselves.  And there are real consequences that can hurt us.  Illness is a real problem.  Infectious disease is a real problem.  God does judge sin.  God does send folks to hell when they tell Him no to His grace.   It is real.  But God is more than just judge.  And the world is more than just the place that can kill us.  It is the place were we can make friends and find love and know the joy of family and community.  It is the place where yes people hurt us, stab us in the back, even at times destroy us, but it is also a place where there is love and friendship and real trust and loyalty.  And so with God.  Yes, like Adam and Eve we have a real reason to fear.  We sin and we are accountable.  But we have a real and bigger reason to love and trust.  God loves us.   God wants good for us. 

So what about Covid?  What are we to do?  Are we to just pray it away?  Are we to just assume that because we are Christian God will protect us?  If we have enough right faith it will all be ok?  Are we to conclude that our friends and family who get sick or who die just weren’t very good Christians?

Lutherans have always understood that the above is baloney.  It is here that the revelation of God through Scripture of how He operates in this world is of great value to us. There is one king but several kingdoms.  There is the kingdom of the right hand of Christ what we call the kingdom of grace where His church resides.  Here God bestows love and mercy forgiving sin through His grace as proclaimed in the Gospel and provided in His chosen means of Baptism and Holy Communion.  (for my friend who are not sacramental you can still agree with me here – God has grace – God forgives.  It was His choice to forgive.  We love because He first loved us.)

Then there is the kingdom of the left hand of Christ which is His rulership over the world.  Romans 13 talks of this, the role of government to use the force of law and even when necessary punishment to keep peace.  In the left hand kingdom we find the doctrine of vocation – God empowers people to work together for the common good through the giving of gifts and abilities unique to each person. Everyone is good at something and when you find it and live it life can be grand indeed.  (Not sinless, but grand nonetheless.  Think Carpe Dieum. )  This is the realm not just of law and order but of art, and architecture, engineering and construction, and science and medicine.  This is the realm of social distancing and masks. And God has something to say about this to us as well.

The Fifth Commandment.  Thou shalt not kill. What does this mean?--Answer. We should fear and love God that we may not hurt nor harm our neighbor in his body, but help and befriend him in every bodily need [in every need and danger of life and body].

You see it is not just about us.  God has put us into this world together and we need each other. We depend on each other.  And truth is we are in each other’s power.  We all live in this nested system of networks that include family and friend and work and even society.  The decisions made by a few folks we shall never personally know on the Supreme Court can have big impacts on our lives.  But closer to home the folks we network with in our families, in our workplaces, in our communities have big impact on us.  What another person does can have serious impact on us.  What we do can have serious impact on others.  And God designed it that way.  He looked at Adam and said, it isn’t good for Him to be alone.  It is never just about “me”.  It is never not also about “me” but it is always about “us”.  Sometimes the other’s needs outweigh our own.  Sometimes fairness and justice would say my need has predominance in the “us”.  But the world isn’t always fair and people who have power in our lives are not always kind. 

So why do folks kill others?  Think about it.  What could motivate someone to actually kill another person?  Fear.  Anger.   That person is the ultimate threat.   None of us think we are capable of murder but we think other people are so capable.  I’ve known people who were killed for the dumbest of reasons.  Maybe you do too. But it is real problem, real enough that God knew He had to make a commandment about it.  Thou shalt not kill.   And Luther came at life with eyes wide open.  What does this mean?  We should fear and love God so that we don’t “hurt” and we don’t “harm” others.   But God loves us like children.  He sees us as His family and looks at us as brothers and sisters.  It is not enough to just not hurt and harm.  God want us to “help” and “befriend”.   

Fear is not necessarily the opposite of faith.  It can be.  If it comes to predominance the kingdom of the right so that we doubt God’s love for us (I didn’t have enough faith so I caught Covid, God must not love me.) then yes fear can be very detrimental to faith.

But if we have fear that says, wow, there is a reality out there that God has given us some ability to do something about together.  We can’t run away from it (the flee response) but maybe we do have some tools to resist it (the fight response) and together we can make a difference not just for ourselves but for everyone.

So are you afraid of Covid?  Are you afraid to catch it?  Are you afraid of what it will do to your body if you catch it?  Are you afraid for your spouse, your children, your grandparents, your aunts and uncles and your dearest friend?  That’s ok.  It’s a rational and reasonable response to a real situation.  You are seeing reality for what it is.  The question is what will you do with your fear.  Will you allow your subconscious to drive your action into worry, into hysterics, into despair and helplessness, will you turn to denial and fantasies, or… be bold and courageous.   Asking yourself what is in my power to help?   Looking at what God is making possible through knowledge of how the universe works, through the power of science and medicine in the left hand kingdom, Godly gifts of vocation for life in this world.  And never forgetting that truth is we shall all die.  No I’m not saying we should all just give up, take our chances, let the chips fall where they may.   We do what we can to help our neighbors and ourselves, but if in the end we still get sick and fall it wasn’t because we deserved it because we failed worse than others, we sinned worse than others, we didn’t have enough faith and others had better faith.  Life isn’t fair, it isn’t just.  God isn’t fair either.  He gives us what we don’t deserve.   The world and people often hurt us in ways we don’t deserve.  God gives us good things we don’t deserve.  And the greatest and never ending is the grace of Christ that guarantees us eternal life.  Our eternal destiny isn’t on us.  It has nothing to do with what we do.  Truth is there is nothing we can do to change how it is going to turn out.  Unbelief says that is true – we all die, we all fade from memory.  Life ultimately has no meaning or value.  God says buuuullllll hooockeeeey.  Life has meaning because God says it does.  Jesus said the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.  Jesus says I have come that you might have life and that abundantly.  Life is ours because God says so.  Mercy.  Grace.  Love.   This is why ultimately we don’t have to be afraid.  I’m not saying we don’t do our part.  I’m not saying  pretend there isn’t a real threat to life and limb out there.  What I’m saying is in the end it will be ok, we will be with Jesus in the end.

But its ok to want to stick around to see you children grow up, to see your grandkids.   Its ok to want to keep having grandma and grandpa at the Thanksgiving table.  Its ok to not want to have to grieve the loss of your spouse.  Its ok to care about your neighbor and do what you can.  Why?  Because that is showing fear and love as Luther reminds us.  Facing the facts with love and concern.  That is Godly fear.  And that is Godly love.  

Jesus was suffering in the garden of Gethsemane.  I read that text and it sure sounds like he was afraid.  He knew the pain He would suffer.  But He knew the threat.  If he did nothing it would all burn and His beloved children would be lost.  So He was courageous and He was bold.  And it cost Him much suffering and death.  But in making the sacrifice for us He changed everything.  We were saved.  And He was risen.  And He had saved His family and we now have a Father in heaven.

Patience

Patience.  With some things it may come easier to us.  With other it may be more difficult.  I have a friend whose autistic son developed a form of leukemia that is common in childhood.  But then came Covid-19.  He was able to recover from this but did develop guillain-barré syndrome as a result.  It seems like it is one thing after another.  But thank God the young man is regaining some movement in his body again.

It was about this time of year 15 years ago that I was serving in my first year as a chaplain at Andrews Air Force Base.  I was a captain and the junior officer on the staff.  Normally the team consisted of a Colonel, a Lt. Colonel, two Major, and four captains.  But in the spring of that year things were somewhat different.  The Lt. Col had just retied.  The Senior Major had just gone to Korea to serve as Wing Chaplain having been selected for Lt. Col.    The Senior Captain had just left for Europe as he had been selected for Major.  The next Captain in line was getting out having been passed over for promotion.  The next Captain was... lets just say not yet adjusted to the military.  The other Major took over.  

Then I get a call, out of the blue, and unexpected.  I am wanted in the Wing Commander's office at 3pm.   I have no clue why.  I get into my service dress and report to be directed to meet with the Vice Wing Commander.  It seems our Major had shown up 30 minutes late for a group meeting of all the brass on base that he was supposed to chair, and in civilian clothing and unshaven to boot.   As I left the office I found myself in charge of the chapel. 

Suddenly the situation was different.  And I was visible in a way I had not been before.  I had authority and responsibility that would normally not come for ten or more years.  Fortunately I had a senior enlisted leader who knew the systems and the regs and kept me out of trouble.  But I also had a great boss.   Oh, that's right... where was the Colonel in all this?  He was in the hospital recovering from guillain-barré syndrome.   As soon as he could talk I was consulting with him on what he wanted done.  Because I understood that even though I had the authority and responsibility and enough military experience (10 years at this point total with my navy experience) it still wasn't my wing.  The Colonel was the Wing Chaplain. This was his team, his vision, his priorities.  He  had far more experience than I.  He knew the base, the leadership, the people, and the whole ball of wax.  But even if I had been his Lt. Col it was still his wing. 

But that taste of responsibility hooked me into deciding rather than doing one or two tours I would make a career out of the military.  It was a long ten years of being a captain and learning and taking orders and taking point while working within the boundaries and vision set by my boss but the day came when I made Major, when I would be leading my own team -- six chaplains to a field hospital in Kandahar.  The learning, training, working, and patience had paid off.

And things changed, over night.  I had leukemia.  I would have to adjust to a new situation that God saw fit to place me into.  Fortunately I was directed to and called by a wonderful group of saints at church in San Antonio. 

Its easier to be patient when we think the outcome will be what we want.  But when that outcome is up in the air, or when the outcome is different from the "time we put in", it can be a difficult adjustment to deal with.  I pray that my friend's son has a full recovery from leukemia, Covid-19, and from guillain-barré syndrome.  Its been a long road for them already.  It will likely be a long road for them yet.  And the results are uncertain.  I pray for them.  I hope for them.  But this is an imperfect world and results are never certain.  All we can do is the best we can, pray for God's mercy, and remember in the end He's the boss.   Its not so much our world, our ways, our desires, but His world.  And sometimes we may not understand all His decisions.  We might even want to resists His decisions and maybe struggle to trust His decisions just like we do with any other authority in this life that we don't see eye to eye with.  Its not easy to be patient when important things are on the line. 

These are days that call for patience.  We so much want things back to normal.  Every day there are always some people somewhere who are begging for more time, begging for things to get back to normal, begging for these days to pass.  Today because of Covid-19 there are far more of us feeling this way.  Some because they are sick.  Some because they are out of work.  Some because they are stir crazy from being stuck at home.  And there are more people today adjusting to a new normal.  There are families who have lost loved ones to this new illness.   There are folks who have recovered but with lingering complications.  There are folks with sick children and sick spouses, and sick parents who are afraid for them every day.  These days are far from normal not matter how much we crave.  And it is easy to understand why patience would wear thin. 

It took my boss a long time to recover.  Six months he was not able to be in the office.  Six months I went to his house every day to talk about what was going on and the decisions that needed to be made.  I better understand that now that I am myself laid up with a leg that is healing slower than I want it too.  And to be honest I don't know what things will look like three months or six months from now.  The therapist says it will take time and to be patient.  But only time will tell how well it heals. Only time will tell how our society does with this new reality.  Only time will tell when things will really start to get "back to normal" and what that normal will look like.

Every day someone somewhere deals with this exact reality.  Cancer.   Infection.  Accident.  Divorce.   Death.   What is new is that so many of us are sharing this reality at the same time, in different degrees, but in a way the same thing.   It will take time to know.  And what we will learn is up in the air.  Its hard to be patient.  Its hard to sacrifice for others.  But this is our reality in a fallen world.  It is something we all share in.  Something we can understand better now for others.  Before when we hear of tragedy we pray for others and in the back of our mind thank God it is not us, not our child.  But today it is all of us, and tomorrow could be any of us.  And that changes things.  Could it make us more mindful, more understanding, more patient with each other.  More willing to sacrifice for one another as today we are perhaps more dependent on one another than ever before. 

My boss recovered, mostly, a few side effects.  And thanks to his leadership and guidance all those afternoons at his home, the chapel did just fine.  He came back and I returned to being the junior Captain as new staff came in.  And ten years later I was promoted to Major, given orders to build and lead a team to Kandahar only to have to retire because I was no longer able to deploy.  Things didn't work out as planned.  But God knew what He was planning and in the end time revealed His plan and it was better than I had planned.    Even if things don't work out quite as we want in this life, God has promised something new, something restored, a place and a time where there will be no more tears, no more suffering, no  more pain... only understanding, love, peace.   Perhaps these days serve to teach us just how important these things are.  And perhaps these days can teach us the importance of patience.

In The Shadow of the Cross

A fellow pastor shared with me that in his parish in New York he had 40 parishioners in the hospital and that 16 of his flock have already succumbed to the Covid-19 virus.  For almost everyone this crisis has transformed our daily lives on a scale we could not have imagined.   We often hear of a friend or neighbor or even relative who develops and illness or has a serious accident and we grieve for them and pray for them but we may think to ourselves that it probably won't happen to us, at least not now, and go on about our daily lives.   But now, the shadow looms over all of us and going about our daily lives looks very different from a month ago.

It is Good Friday, the day the church remembers the crucifixion of the Savior of the World.  I am writing this in the afternoon.   The disciples are scattered.   Jesus is undergoing His passion leading to His death later today.  His mother and many of his female disciples are watching unable to do anything to help with His suffering, other than be with Him.  Only John is there from the twelve.  Jesus alone carries the weight of the sin of the world. 

It was a dark day for them.  It was hard to see victory or life in the midst of these events.   In fact we call the evening service of remembrance "The Service of Darkness".  Humanity has known many periods when life seemed very dark.   History records how wars devastated people, plagues wiped out entire town, economies have collapsed, crops have failed;  this is not the first time that humanity has been reminded of its fragility.  This is not the first time that a world fallen into sin has made the depth of corruption known.

So how are you feeling?   Are you sad?   Are you mad?   Are you scared?   Are you even glad?   Everyone experiences these things uniquely to themselves.   We may even find ourselves feeling a host of feelings.   We may be grieving Easter gatherings with family and friends in homes and churches.  Part of us may be looking for someone to blame for all the things that have been taken from us.  And it would be fully understandable if you feel scared.   We hear that most people will have a light case if they catch it but then we hear about the suffering of those who grow sicker.  We might be tempted to focus on those part of our health that might make us more susceptible to to the illness.  How do we protect ourselves?  How do we protect our loved ones?  

How do we pay the bills?   Some folks are fully able to stay home sheltered in place while others are still working as essential employees.  Many are worrying about paying rent and mortgages and for food with limited or no income coming in and no end in sight.

This world is now as it was created to be because sin exists in the world and we are being reminded in these days just has tangible and fragile everything is.  And it can make us afraid.  It can make us sad.  It can even make us mad.  

But God is on His throne.   In the shadow of the cross it was hard to understand.  Why did Jesus have to die?  Why did His Father allow it?  Was He not our Messiah?   Why is it ending this way.  ONly it wasn't.    Much of what God does is hidden under an  opposite appearance.   It looked like defeat only the ultimate victory was being achieved.  It looked like injustice, and evil, and sin and death had won.  But in those hours the power of sin and death was broken.  Soon comes Easter.

Easter morning life did not get back to normal.  The disciples and those who believed never went back to life the way it was before.  Jesus death and resurrection changed everything.  Our lives will likely not go back to normal, not the way it was before.  Our innocence and trust is now "informed".   How much we need informed by the Gospel in these days.  For the truth is the Gospel and Jesus have always been the only unshakable ground.  All else has always been shifting sand.  But Jesus is risen even on this day of shadows, even on this day of remembering death, we cannot remember without also remembering He is Risen!  Salvation is just as certain today as it was before.  Indeed each day that passes is one day closer we are to receiving all that God has promised us in Christ. 

So on this Good Friday I encourage you to remember:   You are Christ's!   Christ is yours!

Pastor Reedy

Palm Sunday 2020

Palm Sunday, the day the church remembers the triumphal entry of Jesus into Jerusalem.  It is a joyous festival full of dynamic hymns and the powerful story of Christ's entry to the shouts of people while he rode on the back of a donkey in fulfillment of prophesy. We think of children waving the palm branches in procession as we remember and celebrate these events.

But this year is different.  2020 is different.  Most churches will not be able to gather together in person to wave the branches, and shout together "Hosanna, blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord"  We won't be able to hear one another's voices singing those beautiful hymns of the day.

Perhaps this Palm Sunday is in some ways more like the first than any we have every known.   The disciples were caught up in the excitement, but Jesus knew what this ride meant, where this ride would ultimate lead.  That in less than a week he would be dying, his every breath an agony, as the life drained from his broken body as He carried the weight of the sin of the world.   This is why Palm Sunday is closely connect also with "Passion Sunday" or the remembrance of Christ's death.  It was a celebration because the horror of the week was hidden to the crowds.   But Jesus knew.  

On the journey up to Jerusalem Jesus knew.  The people traveling with Jesus were expecting He would restore the Kingdom (of their expectations) immediately as soon as He arrived.   (Luke 19:11)  So he told them the parable of the tenants.   A Lord gives three servants ten minas and then goes on his way.   The first uses it for the service of His Lord and makes 10 more.  The second makes 5 more.  But the third was afraid and so hid his and kept it safe.   But upon the Lord's return this last servant finds himself haven fallen short of His Lord's expectations.

Normally when we meditate on this parable we do so with a focus that we are called to be faithful stewards for God's kingdom with what God gives us.  But there is another piece here.   Jesus was telling them that He would depart they would remain but they would remain for a purpose.  They would remain to work.

The Kingdom would not come magically.  Its not the kind of thing that happens because a shoe fits on a princess, or a prince kisses a sleeping princess or anything of that nature.  This kingdom comes because of death... the death of its Lord.   And it comes because of life... the resurrection of its Lord.  And it endures because of His ruling following His ascension into heaven to the right hand of the Father. 

So perhaps this Palm Sunday, this Holy Week is more like the first than any we have ever experienced.   Jesus came knowing that the celebration would be over by the end of the week.  Crowds could gather on this first day.  By the end of the week it would be a small gathering in a hidden upper room for safety as Jesus prepared His disciples not for the instant fixing of all things broken but for His death.  By the end of the week it would be Jesus and his closest praying in secret in Gethsemane waiting for what He knew was coming.  Praying in anguish at the suffering He knew He must endure.

  Jesus came into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday knowing what was coming.  Still yet He wept for Jerusalem that day not for Himself.  He wept for the pain and suffering that people go through, most inflicted upon self or others because of sin.  He wept for a world broken and suffering because of sin.   And He moved onward, step by step toward Calvary, toward suffering, toward death.  Because He wanted to save us from it.

Next weekend would find the disciples who so boldly walking in parade to shouts and joy to hiding in their dwelling place from fear of the Jews.   For them Holy Week would not be about big public gatherings and wonderful hymns and great food.  It was about seeing Jesus do His final teaching.  It was about hiding in secret from those who sought to harm them.  It was about having nothing but Him to rely upon and then seeing even Him taken from them.  They had all they trusted taken from them.   All their expectations fallen short.   All that seemed so solid turning to water.

So yes, how much this 2020 Holy Week is like theirs.   We too are sheltered with close family not out of fear of the Jews but out of respect for a contagious and deadly disease that exists in a world that remains broken by sin.  Yes, now we have 2020 vision.  We see a little better the true nature of our world.  All those things we trusted and hoped in seem so powerless right now.  All those things that seemed so important and essential have been stripped from us.   In ways we have never understood before we are asked to love our neighbor through sacrifice.  

But there is also a difference.   It is over two thousand years since the first one.  Jesus is Risen!  He is Risen Indeed!  Yes that is the Easter call but right now we need a little Easter, well, we need a lot of Easter.  We need to remember and focus that the victory is won. 

Sure it would be so much easier on us if Jesus would just make the kingdom of God appear immediately, destroy all sin, all disease or at least make Covid-19 go away so we can get back to life as normal.  Get back to work, back to our favorite restaurant, see sports on TV again, see our friends again.   But this is the time of the ten minas.  It is the time of endurance.     It is a time to do the best we can with what we have to work with.  Much has been taken from us but not Christ.  Not the Gospel.  Not the resurrection.   He is Risen!

We do not have to be as the one tenant who so cowered in fear that he did nothing.  But we cannot work magic nor deny the limitations of our 2020 reality.  So what can we do?

The Gospel is for you.  Tune into a worship service and hear the Word of the Lord.   You are welcome to join my church Sundays at 11am at www.mtcsa.org

You can pray with and for your family.  You can share family devotions.  You can share family time. 

And you can ponder the mysteries of our faith.  All those things that so consume our time and energy, many are taken from us.  It is a time where we can have 2020 vision -- what is really going on?  what is really important?  What really matters?  When you shake out the dross what remains?

Christ is yours!  You are Christ's!   His suffering is over.  The glorious day of His return is closer every breath.  The specter of death hangs over us, but He has transformed it into the promise of eternal life.   Christ is with us.  We are abandoned.  We are not alone.  We are the people of the ten minas.   And it will work out in the end.  The Lord is coming again.

An Unexpected Perspective: Post #4 in the Face of Covid

Dear Friends,

I've been offline for a week now for reasons I did not expect.    I am a clinically trained retired military chaplain who has had quite a bit of experience doing chaplaincy in various hospitals.  So when I first began to hear of this Covid-19 infection in China, I expected it would make its way beyond the borders of China.  When Italy's numbers were looking different from China's I suspected it was worse than China was reporting and began making some preparations. 

A few weeks ago after the Mayor's order went into place our ministry team at Mount Calvary made some plans and shut down the office shifting to a remote ministry model to keep our people both safe, encouraged, and spiritually fed.  I fully expected to be spending the next weeks continuing to write a study I've been working on, prepping for online sermons, making calls, and writing these blogs while trying to enjoy being in the house with my family for an extended period of time.

That all came crashing down.  Literally.   I went for a walk,  In the space of a second things changed.  In one step things changed.  Unexpected.  Out of control.  I went from being independent/interdependent to dependency.   I won't go into all the gruesome details but I tore up my left leg and I was down. 

So I got to spend some time extra special close with some heroes this week.  First was the 9/11 operator who as I began to go into shock was reassuring me that help was close.  Second were the EMS folks who had to navigate me safely off the nature trail and into the back of the bus.   These guys are up close and personal with people who are in absolute need and they have no way of knowing if they are being exposed or  not. 

The next 12 hours are a fuzzy blur.  I was taking into the ED at BAMC here and they worked me up.  Somehow, I was able to get an MRI that night.  God was watching over me.  Because of the risk of Covid-19 there was talk of trying to get me home and having me return at a later date for surgery, but at very supportive LTC put the kabash on that plan.  

12 hours later I admitted into 4W of BAMC with a roommate who was in far worse shape than myself having severed his leg at the ankle.  We prayed together and as our pain meds kicked in we talked for awhile.   He had surgery first thing that morning.  I was second. 

Over the next three days the staff of 4W cared for me like I was family.   I could not have been more proud or more thankful for my military family.   PT came and got me up and ambulatory enough to come home.

Extraordinary circumstances can require extraordinary adjustments.   There was no way I was getting up the flight and a half of steps to our bedroom and bathroom.  I knew I'd have to be downstairs.  So my wife with help from a dear friend from church helped us secure a hospital bed.   And they agreed to allow me to transport home by ambulance as I was not stable enough to navigate steps into the house.  Those few steps from gurney to bed were a bear.  It is going to be a long road and the doctor isn't promising I'll walk again properly, though prospects are good with time and lots of physical therapy.  A week later I'm doing well considering.  Still basically on bed rest for six weeks but I'm home and not at risk in a rehab facility because of the care I received from these men and women of 4W.   In six weeks the real work of physical therapy begins.

But that is only part of the story.  For you see that first night in a room they came through inventorying everything.   The tripod trees, the pumps, the boxes of gloves, everything... And then everything I didn't need was taken.  They were building specialized areas for the treatment of covid-19 patients.  I talked to these men and women on the front lines of this war and it is no joke.  Yes there were patients in the hospital.  Yes, keeping themselves and the patients safe is an added burden as everything has to be so carefully done.   I wore an M95 mask when I made calls and wearing one out of the hospital for my safetly I was reminded of how uncomfortable they are.  Wearing them during an entire shift -- it just hurts if it is being worn properly.

Pray for these guys.   They were there for me when I needed them.  They are there for so many others.   Yes, a lot of things that people go to the hospital for can be delayed to help folks stay safe and help have enough people to help those who get sick.  But there are still folks who must have surgery to recover, who must have cancer treatment, who must have this or the other because it can't wait.  Every bed now is vital. Lives depend on it.  

You can be a hero to.   Do everything you can not to get sick.   I pray if anyone who reads this does that you have a light case, but believe me, if it comes heavy it will be something you will not want to go through.  This isn't the flu.  It isn't a cold.  It is a unthinking virus that will strip the breath from your body and leaving you gasping to death.  You can be the hero and you can help save others.   Its going to be a long while before we are free of these restrictions.  WE are going to be tempted to bend a little bit.  The longer we are safe the more we are going to be tempted to be complacent.  We will be tempted to assume we are not sick and the folks we are going to be around are not sick.  And this is why infections rates continue to rise in many places. 

These men and women are full of compassion, skill and dedication.  But they are already growing tired.   Long shifts.  Rotating groups in and out of the hospital.  Many of them in direct contact with people with this or other infectious diseases.  All the other things that kill us have not taken a vacation.  They need our help to have the strength to go on.  I needed them to have the strength to endure and begin to recover.  They need us now as much as we need them and we as a people need them more than every.

You can be a hero too.   You are being asked for a heavy sacrifice.  But when this is over I pray we can say we were a nation of heroes.