Return from False Witness

My brother pastor and I are taking turns preaching for our Lenten midweek services in our respective congregations using the them "Return to Jesus" put out by our denomination's publishing house.  This week he preached on the theme "Return from False Witness" and used as one of his illustrations the story of Richard Jewell.  The timing was rather ironic because I had just began watching the Netflix serious on the Centennial Olympic Park bombing.   I followed the story as it unfolded as the authorities tried to capture Eric Rudolph in the Nantahala National Forest.  This area of the country was just a few hours from where I grew up and I had hiked the Appalachian trail through the northern portion of that forest a few years before.  But as much as this story is about Eric Rudolph, this story is also about a man named Richard Jewell.   

Richard was working as a part-time security guard during the US Olympics and in the course of his rounds spotted a suspicious back-pack and alerted authorities who upon discovering it was indeed a bomb were able to partially evacuate the crowd certainly saving many lives.

But the pressure was on.   The FBI was on the case and the agents investigating were feeling the heat from upper leadership who needed a "win".  This was on the international stage and the FBI at the time was still reeling from a number of very public enforcement events that didn't go well (Ruby Ridge, Waco...).   The mayor of Atlanta was pushing for a suspect to be named quickly to minimize the economic impact of the bombing.  In just a few days Richard Jewell who before had been labeled "a hero" would be labeled "a hero bomber", a particular time of bomber who plants the bombs so he can discover them and be a hero. The only problem -- it wasn't true.  

The FBI would leak it to the press and the press would run with it.  Jewell lost his job, his reputation, the ability to leave his house safely, his privacy.  He had to get rid of his phone.   Later when the truth came out big networks settled, but the local paper fought and fought defending that while it wasn't true that Jewell was the bomber, based on the information at hand it was fair and respectable journalism to report what they reported.  That a man's life was destroyed for some time didn't matter.  

The most potent part of the Netflix series for me was the scene where Jewell is speaking and saying (paraphrased here) "I can understand why people would think someone like me would be a suspect, someone fat, slow, who has made mistakes in his past, who doesn't have girlfriend, who isn't successful at life..."  

Character assassination.   

Martin Luther wrote in his Large Catechism regarding the eight commandment -- you shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

Here belongs particularly the detestable, shameful vice of speaking behind a person’s back and slandering, to which the devil spurs us on, and of which there would be much to be said. For it is a common evil plague that every one prefers hearing evil to hearing good of his neighbor; and although we ourselves are so bad that we cannot suffer that any one should say anything bad about us, but every one would much rather that all the world should speak of him in terms of gold, yet we cannot bear that the best is spoken about others.

Take the following story for example.

 Mat 26:57-68  Then those who had seized Jesus led him to Caiaphas the high priest, where the scribes and the elders had gathered.  (58)  And Peter was following him at a distance, as far as the courtyard of the high priest, and going inside he sat with the guards to see the end.  (59)  Now the chief priests and the whole council were seeking false testimony against Jesus that they might put him to death,  (60)  but they found none, though many false witnesses came forward. At last two came forward  (61)  and said, “This man said, ‘I am able to destroy the temple of God, and to rebuild it in three days.’”  (62)  And the high priest stood up and said, “Have you no answer to make? What is it that these men testify against you?”  (63)  But Jesus remained silent. And the high priest said to him, “I adjure you by the living God, tell us if you are the Christ, the Son of God.”  (64)  Jesus said to him, “You have said so. But I tell you, from now on you will see the Son of Man seated at the right hand of Power and coming on the clouds of heaven.”  (65)  Then the high priest tore his robes and said, “He has uttered blasphemy. What further witnesses do we need? You have now heard his blasphemy.  (66)  What is your judgment?” They answered, “He deserves death.”  (67)  Then they spit in his face and struck him. And some slapped him,  (68)  saying, “Prophesy to us, you Christ! Who is it that struck you?”

People don't lie about others, don't work to destroy the reputation of others without reason, but the reason is usually not an honorable one.  The Sanhedrin wanted Jesus gone.  He had challenged their exercise of their authority calling them hypocrits.  He disobeyed rules to not associate with sinners, tax collectors, and prostitutes.   He had ignored their rules for religious observance including healing on the Sabbath which they defined as "work".  But the big one was Jesus claimed to be divine, to be God's Son and the promised Savior.  How big a deal was this for them?   I really began to understand just how much their blindness lead them to ignore all the true facts about Jesus (His compassion, His love, His miracles, His divine power) when a chaplain rabbi I served with commented that for him the Pharisees, Saducees, and the Sanhedrin were the heroes in the story because Jesus has to be a false Messiah.  Why?  Because if Jesus is the Son of God and the Savior, their theology so carefully crafted by experts would have to be at least in this case, wrong.   The FBI needed a win.   The media had money to make selling newspapers and advertising. 

The experts say.   People in positions of authority carry a lot of weight.  There is a scene in the Netflix series where the FBI is searching Jewell's house and his mother keeps asking him "what did you do"?  Whether Netflix is taking artistic license here that his own mother suspected him, the story as portrayed is true to life.  She says, "The FBI doesn't just do this for no reason."   The FBI, the Press, not the gossip rags but the big names -- CNN, NBC, the New York Post.  People in positions of authority carry great weight when they make a proclamation.  

The truth came out.  The FBI folks that made mistakes didn't really pay any price.   Most of the media groups settled their libel suits but it is just money for them. CNN survives.  NBC survives.  The local paper survived.    Jewell died young at the age of 44 from chronic health conditions not likely helped by this episode, though the police chief of Luthersville gave Jewell his second chance and he was hired as deputy.

Character assassination:  at the heart of the crucifixion of Jesus, in the public eye with the story of Richard Jewell.  But how many stories are out there that don't see the light of day, perhaps your own story.    I know brother pastors who have had their ministries and in some cases their careers destroyed by this kind of behavior.  

The lay deacon, one of the founders of the church, and treasurer who begins tearing down the pastor because he won't practice open communion. (See for more information).  The deacon finds an ally in the Congregation's president, another founder.  Surely these leaders can't be wrong about the pastor.  Ironically six months after the pastor leaves it is discovered that these same men had been putting a portion of the congregational offering into a separate bank account to pay the previous pastor under the table so he wouldn't lose his social security.   The attacks on the pastor had began during the church's leadership board five year planning process, when he encouraged them to do an audit and take a detailed look into the history of the congregation's finances.

The narcissist associate pastor who awes the selection committee and the church's staff on first impressions but soon after arriving goes to war with the senior pastor because he isn't conservative enough.   There are things in worship like children's messages that don't belong.  And the processional cross is in the wrong place.  And you have to do this different and you are doing that wrong.   Finding allies among some of the most conservative elders, a fishing expedition is started against the senior pastor who is trying to draw boundaries and put the breaks onto destructive change.  He is labeled a bully and divisive and encouraged to move along.

The economy is tanking and the church's attendance and offerings are going down.  Stress is up among the leadership and the pastoral staff.  There are concerns about layoffs.  Then the older pastor gets sick and has to take some time off.  His assistant takes the opportunity to start feeding misinformation to the older pastor about the staff and lay leadership who acts on it from a distance thinking he is offering guidance for the good of the church. But the assistant is able then to twist the older pastor's words and actions in such a way that the leaders begin to believe he is not longer fit to serve and the assistant is able to move into the position with a corresponding increase in salary.

The young pastor in a small town who tries to council a young woman (daughter of a prominent church family) regarding the pitfalls of living together outside of marriage who finds his character and performance suddenly under attack by an elder, president, and trustee (all who happen to be in the same family).   Rapidly losing the trust of the members he moves on to another congregation.

If it can happen to Jesus, the Son of God, if it can happen to pastors, if it can happen to an ordinary man doing his job and saving lives like Richard Jewell, it can happen to anyone.  

If people who spend their lives trying to do what is right and stand for what is right -- the Sanhedrin, rabbis and Pharisees and Sadducees, FBI agents and reputable journalists, church leaders and even pastors can fall into the trap of thinking that the attacking of another person's character is justified, anyone can fall into the trap and become the harm that befalls our neighbor.  

If the public can be swayed by the erroneous testimony of experts (Sanhedrin, FBI, the media, pastors, church leaders, _______ fill in the blank), so can we be sucked into the feeding frenzy.

The world, our communities, our churches, our families, or workplaces would all be better if we actually paid attention to the 8th commandment.  People's lives would be better, maybe our own.

Luther's Small Catechism:  (8th Commandment)

Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor. What does this mean? — Answer.

We should fear and love God that we may not deceitfully belie, betray, slander, or defame our neighbor, but defend him, think and speak well of him, and put the best construction on everything.

So how do we return from this?   When we are the victim we seek solace in the truth, in the light of day, in the loving presence of God.  When we are the perpetrators it is the same.  We face the truth (about ourselves) and acknowledge our sin, own up to it, even apologize, and find forgiveness for harming our neighbor from the love of Christ who died for our sins.

The Big Ten

What does it say that if you say "The Big Ten" the first thing that will come to many people's minds is college football?  Today we are going to look at the original big ten, the ten commandments.  

The Israelite slaves have successfully fled their Egyptian slave masters with the intervention of God Himself and are now camped at the base of Mount Sinai.   And from the mountain comes Moses with the commandments of God inscribed into stone by God Himself.  This is serious business.  

There will be other commandments, ones like do not mix meat and dairy, don't wear garments of two different fabrics and so forth, commandments just for the Israelites so they stand out distinct among the people of the world.  But these ten are different.  They are universal.  And they are non-negotiable.

These are not the ten suggestions, though we tend to treat them as such.  We come up with all sorts of creative reasons to get around them sometimes while claiming to be following the spirit of them.  I can take these things from my employer because they don't pay me enough.  I can move in with my boyfriend or girlfriend because we want to make sure of things before we get married.     We negotiate with them in our minds all the time as if our response to them is some form of compromise, but the truth is it is a one sided dialogue because we just aren't listening.  

We ask ourselves what is the minimal thing we have to do to be in compliance.  We tell ourselves, I have never killed anyone, but Jesus tells us if we have every hated anyone we are just as guilty.  Luther in his small catechism helps us see that the big ten isn't just about the least we should do, but about cultivating a way of thinking that asks what is the excellent kind of life, how can we do the best we can do?

Take his explanation of the fifth commandment,  "Thou shalt not kill. What does this mean? — Answer. We should fear and love God that we may not hurt nor harm our neighbor in his body, but help and befriend him in every bodily need in every need and danger of life and body." (Small Catechism)

It sounds great if we really think about it.  Imagine a world where everyone looked out for... well everyone. But the more common message you will hear in our world today is about the oppressiveness of religion and commandments in general.  That commandments don't really originate with God nor reflect any given foundation to our lives but were created by men in power to keep people under their power.  The critical progressive movement sees these as the Israelites fleeing one form of slavery to only fall into a moral slavery.  If that were so, one would think that a commandment against murder would be somewhat counterproductive.  Unjust use of force and threat to livelihood and life has always been a favored tool of the tyrant.

Yes the world would be a much better place if we didn't kill one another, if we didn't lie about one another, if no one stole from each other but actually helped one another have what we need to live, if marriage was honored and families were stable... if people recognized the love of God and relished in it.

For the first thing God said when given the commandments,  "I am your God."

God didn't give these commandments as a burden or a test.  These are family rules.  God sees each human person as His child.  We were created to be in relationship with Him and we were created to be in relationship with one another.  Jesus summed the big ten up with the words Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind and strength and love your neighbor as ourselves.  There is no escaping that human life is corporate life.  Imagine a world where these were actually followed.  How much better would your life be if your neighbor loved you so much he followed them?  But why should he when we ourselves don't?  And we know as a corporate humanity we don't follow them so we need laws to protect us from each other.

So yes, the big ten, the Law as we call it, was given as a guard.   We use the word "guard" to refer to its role in corporate civic society, that these are to inspire our legal frameworks.  Used to our nation acknowledged the importance of the big ten in the foundation of western legal and ethical systems.  But for some time we have stopped pretending to be inspired by them in our culture.  We can now work seven days a week.  We can terminate the life of human beings without blame if they are unborn.  Marriage is redefined and unnecessary, you can just live together and few think anything about it.  And who really expects the public, the media, the politician to honor the eighth commandment and speak only truth about each other.   We live in a society consumed by greed and coveting.

So we say at least Christians should follow them, and yes these are a guide, a word we use for their role for the Christian.  But we follow so poorly.  And so they also stand before us like a mirror.  When we don't look away, don't shade our eyes with self-justifications for behavior, our heart and spirit stand stark naked in front of the mirror and it isn't always pretty.  We haven't loved our neighbors as ourselves.  We've hedged with God's Law.  We've bent it, tried to negotiate with it, justified our twisting of it, even ignoring of it.  

So what can be done?   St. Paul I think explains it the best for us in Romans chapter three.

19 Now we know that whatever the law says it speaks to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be stopped, and the whole world may be held accountable to God. 20 For by works of the law no human being will be justified in his sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin.

21 But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it— 22 the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction: 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus...

Truth be told we are unable to keep the law well enough to be justified in God's sight.  But God is about family.   God is about love.  And so He sent His own Son to rescue us from ourselves.  He is the only person since Adam and Eve who fulfilled the law perfectly, and so He stood in for us, He took our place.  He gave His life to pay for our disobedience that we may be forgiven, restored, and renewed.  We'll never keep the law perfectly, but now with the help of the Holy Spirit we may do better than ever.  We go to heaven because of one reason only -- the grace of God.  He forgives us.  But while we live, He also helps us to be ... well neighborly, to be a bit more like a loving family.  How can we best say thank you to God for saving us for all eternity, by loving those He loves -- our fellow human beings. It can never earn us heaven, but it can make this place a little bit better until He returns.

 

Return from Betrayal

 

Betrayal.  It is a horrible word.   Heavy.  Dreadful.  And words like it:   disloyal, treacherous, faithless.  Is the kind harm that can only be done by someone who was a friend, a confidant, a trusted partner.  It is a double-cross, a stab in the back, the Judas kiss, often done with deceit, like the spider that sucks you into its web.   

We think of the betrayer as the lowest of the low.  Benedict Arnold, Brutus...Judas.

Betrayer:   a word to describes a person so self-consumed they will hurt anyone to get their way.  They deserve no respect, no honor; their true character on display.  Where trust has been given the betrayer forges it into a knife and plunges it into one's back, sometimes even with a kiss.

If you have ever been betrayed you know the pain it causes.

A husband who comes home to his wife, the mother of his children, and tells her he is moving in with a young woman because his wife got fat.

The trusted associate and friend who the boss felt sorry for when he needed a job, then plays his boss with false information who acts upon it with tragic result and let go the board while the associate gets his boss's job.  

The young self-important pastor who conspires with certain elders and leaders to run off the senior pastor because he doesn't see eye to eye with the senior pastor, even if it means splitting the congregation.

The trusted first Sergeant who convinced young female airmen to help him only to manipulate them into a situation where he can abuse them.

Real stories.  Real history.  Human history is full of betrayal, perhaps even your own history.

One of the hard things about betrayal is you don't often see it coming.  The person who betrays was on the inside, was trusted, sometimes even family.   Look at King David and Absalom.   David is king of Israel.  Absalom is his own son, a prince, lacking little.  But Absalom has become convinced that he would be a better leader, that David is weak, and wrong for Israel.  So he begins working.  Talking.  And he gains a hearing with David's own closest counselor Ahithophel.  Soon the conspiracy is growing.  As the Bible puts it "the people with Absalom kept increasing."   Absalom makes his move and David to protect his family that he loves is forced to flee, ironically to the Mount of Olives, the place Judas betrays Jesus.  Ahithophel offer to take 12,000 men to go after David. They aren't just going to depose him, they want to destroy him.  And the Bible says this seemed right in the eyes of Absalom and the elders of Israel.    His son and his ruling elders have turned against him.  And it seems right to them to do so.

The betrayer often thinks he is right, even justified, that it is necessary, that he is the real hero risen to save the day, at least in his own eyes.   There is history here.  Absalom had a beloved sister raped by another son of David and David had not acted to kill him.  So Absalom killed him.  But David forgave Absalom.  Nonetheless Absalom was convinced David was weak and that he himself would be better leader.

Absalom was charismatic as narcissists and self-important often are.  He was able to get people to follow him, join him, but in his pride he tried to take what was not given to him by God and he lost his life for it.

The Mount of Olives would see a greater betrayal.   Judas, a trusted disciple, one of the inner circle, one of the 12 apostles, who was in the upper room for the last supper.  But the devil had entered Judas.  There was some chink in his armor, something the devil could whisper to, nurture, twist to his purpose.  Some fear, pride or self-righteous belief. We don't know what.  But Judas conspired, he sat it up, for a price.  What people will do for money or power or position, and do it all why pretending to honorable, to be friend, perhaps lying so well that they even convince themselves they are doing the right thing.  And on the Mount of Olives, Judas hands Jesus over to be destroyed with a kiss.

Judas was not alone.  In a few the same humanity that had been blessed for three years in the public ministry of Jesus, who had been healed and made whole, who had received compassion, who had called out "Hosanna, blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord", would cry out "crucify Him!"  And Judas was not the only apostle to abandon Jesus.  After Jesus was seized they ran.  They hid.  Sure, Peter and John circled back and followed at a distance, but Peter would betray Him, three times, "I don't know who He is."   Of the twelve, only John would stand at the foot of cross and watch His Lord die.

Betrayors.  Judas.  Words that describe a despicable person.  But my friends such are we.  Maybe we comfort ourselves pretending we would not have ran, we would not have hid.  We would not have lied to save our lives.  But we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.

The truth is our sin drove the nails into Christ's hands and feet and the spear into Christ's side just as powerfully with deadly purpose as did the kiss of Judas on innocent cheek.

We are the betrayers.

And Christ calls us to return.

King David had to fight his son and his son's followers because the fate of his family and his people was at stake. But he did not desire the death of Absalom.  He had to stop Absalom but he wanted to save him and when he couldn't he grieved his death.

God the Father could have rendered terrible, swift, dreadful and just punish for humanity's rejection of His Son.  But God chose mercy.   He chose compassion.   He calls us to return to Him.

Peter proclaimed the truth after these events to the crowd.  You are just as guilty as the Romans and the Sanhedrin.  You denied the Holy One of God.  You even asked for the murderer Barabbas instead.  But understand this.  God allowed this, even sent His Son for this, so that as the Lamb of God He might save the world from its sins, so that we might return to God and find not condemnation, nor judgment, but mercy, compassion... even love.

For in Christ our sins are blotted out as if they never were.  

O Lord have mercy upon us.  In Christ's name.  Amen.

In The Garden

IN THE GARDEN

Luke 22; Matthew 26

Its that crippling kind of pain that leaves you curled in a ball unable to move.   It leaves you dehydrated from crying for days on end.  It finds you sitting staring at the wall for an hour unable to fathom the why because you don't have the energy or motivation to move.   Many people know what I’m talking about.  Not pain of the body, (though that can certainly be bad too with disease and injury) but pain of a broken soul and a broken heart.

A friend is in the garden right now.  His relationship fell like apart like mist.  Appears that his partner lost faith in him and doesn't want him around anymore.  He is heartbroken, soul broken.  His voice cracks.  His faith in God remains but his faith in life and the world, in someone he trusted,  right now that’s a different story.  His faith in himself…that too is sorely wounded.

I am reminded of Jesus.  On the wall in my home office is an embroidered picture of Jesus kneeling in prayer in the Garden of Gethsamane.  It was a gift from my wife on my ordination day March 24^th 24 years ago.  (Its ironic that I fell and hurt myself having to be off work on the 25^th of March.  My last day in the office was the 24^th of March 24 years after my ordination.  But I digress.  ) 

Life is not without irony.  It was a Thursday night when my friend found out his life was changing forever.  It was a Thursday night when Jesus found Himself also in the garden.    The Garden of Gethsamane:  it was there on that holy ground that the tears of Jesus fell like blood from His eyes.  “Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.” (Luke 22:43)

Jesus knew what was coming.  I don’t believe that made it easier.  I believe it made it harder.  Jesus had just that night had a meal with his disciples. He was desperate to be with them.  “And he said unto them, With desire I have desired to eat this passover with you before I suffer.”  He had gave them not just counsel and friendship and love, in the years He had been with them,  but He gave them Himself body and soul.  He had taken a loaf and a cup and through these had given them everything He was and had.   These were His friends.  He loved being with them.  Twelve men gathered around Him in common purpose.  But not all.

Judas.  One had already decided something was wrong, that he knew better; that Jesus was the problem. There are so many theories about why Judas did what He did.  Some think that he was trying to motivate Jesus to change course, to fix the world as Judas believed it needed fixed.  Others go along the lines that he gave up on Jesus, that he thought Jesus was a fraud.    Maybe Judas even came to believe Jesus was dangerous for his people.  Whatever it was Judas didn’t arrive there by himself and likely not overnight.  Judas sat around talking and listening not just to Jesus but to the other disciples.  And they listened to him.  And what did that talk about.  What was said that  could make Judas so convinced he was right, so self-assured that he knew the right course was to get rid of Jesus.  I don’t know but with how Judas was impacted in guilt after Jesus died, it only makes sense to me that Judas thought in his heart of hearts that he was doing the right thing and somehow was locked into a train of thought that he became blind..  Somehow he had become convinced that it was  better even necessary that Jesus had to be handed over into hands of his known enemies.  Even if it means his destruction and the end of His ministry.

Every now and then we hear a bit of conversation recorded in the Gospels.  We get a piece of it that night.  “And there was also a strife among them, which of them should be accounted the greatest.”  Judas must have thought he was "better" than Jesus.  Smarter.  More right.  More...fill in the blank.  More whatever needed to be to justify his betrayal.  .  Judas wasn't just focused on being the greatest of the disciples, he though he was greater than Jesus Himself.   

Jesus had said “ye shall not be so…”  He who seeks to be the greatest should be the servant of all.  Servant of the people.  Just as Jesus was doing.  For Jesus knew this was His last supper with them.  He’d never sit down with them again.  He would never share the bread or the cup with them again, not in this life.  “And behold the hand of him that betrayeth me is with me on the table.” 

Jesus understands that crippling kind of pain when the one you loved and who you were convinced loved you has a turn of heart and decides life is better without you in it.  Jesus knew what was coming.  In the dark of the morning hours while the rest slept, in the dark so  the people couldn’t  do anything to stop it,  in the garden Judas in his self-righteousness, gave Jesus over with one last kiss on his cheek pretending to be noble but in truth a scoundrel.

My friend is grieving all the “lasts”.  The last suppers.  The last kiss.  The last sitting around the fire with his family.  The last of so many things.  And he is broken.  And Jesus knows.   Jesus understands because He was there before us.

Jesus had had enemies who wanted to remove Him.  Matthew 21:46 tell us they sought to arrest him but were afraid of the people.  In a way the people Jesus ministered to kept his enemies in check.  And it is not lost on us that Jesus' enemies were those who were supposed to be the spiritual guardians of the people. But in their arrogance and self-assurance, they had become blind to the truth of God while convinced they were upholding the truth of God.  In the light of the day in public they were afraid of the people, and so they kept up the pretense of being noble and holy. 

But gardens are messy.  Beautiful in the light of day but in the dark they are messy sometimes dangerous places.  All the Pharisees needed was just one disciple to see it their way.  The devil moves in the night doing his best work behind the scenes.      Betrayals are often negotiated behind closed doors (Matthew 26:15) in the private places in the dark away from seeing eyes only known when the deed is done. Jesus was put to trial in the darkness of night, behind closed doors away from the eyes of the community after being betrayed by the disciple who convinced himself he was doing the right thing.

Gardens are not always what they look like.  We can forget taken in by their beauty but we forget that a time long ago there was a snake in the garden that whispered into ears “you can’t trust God”.  You just can’t.  Eve… you didn’t just misunderstand, says Satan, God lies to you. Satan is always trying to take apart what God has put together.  Sometimes he succeeds.  Jesus says, “the thief comes only to steal, and kill, and destroy;”(John 10:10)  Eve didn’t buy in right away but she did buy in eventually.  And she brought her husband and partner along.  She was created and given vocation by God to be his helper and she would help him fall.  And He would join her.  He would claim it is all her fault, I had nothing to do with it.  It is human nature to think we are right and everyone else wrong; the other, not I the one at fault.  It is human nature to deny the truth of our own sin.    At least now it is for together Adam and Eve would bring their whole world into brokenness and sin and grief.   That is not to diminish that people do hurt others, but sometimes we hurt ourselves too. We forget it takes two to dance the dance.  Not until we are alone and the music fades may it dawn on us.  My friend is facing the truth of this too.  Sometimes we want to jump out of the dance but we find we can't.  The sad truth is my friend was willing to face the music, to work out the issues, but... well the other half was unwillingly.  It is hard for him to understand how someone he was once close isn't even willing to try.

Judas must have been close to Jesus for some time.  He was one of the twelve.  But by Thursday night, Judas had his mind made up.  There was no backing down.  Jesus had to go.

Jesus was in the garden to repair it.  Not to erase it by removing the thorns.  Not to use His divine power like a magic wand to simply make it better or make it all go away.  Jesus was in the garden because we put him there.  He suffered our transgressions.  He was bruised for our iniquities.  It was on us.  It was our fault.  But someone has to the price because when it all goes south we can’t fix it on our own.  So Jesus is in the garden with us. 

But that night Jesus was alone.  Crying out in His misery, His brokenness, alone in the dark hours of the night crying out to the only one there in the moment, His Father.  He was betrayed.  He was betrayed by people closest to him, people who should have known better, people who should have been trustworthy but were not.  He was rejected.  He was denied by two of his closest friends.   Judas and Simon.  And the rest would scatter.   Only one along with some women would watch with compassion from a distance powerless to change anything.  I pray that everyone has a "one" when they are in the garden because without a one it would be a very lonely place indeed.

Adam and Eve didn’t have a one.  They had helped each other into the darkest place possible.  And when God came walking all they knew was fear.   To run.  To hide.  To escape.  God would be their one.  Yes there was judgment but there was compassion.  And God acknowledged they were not alone in this, they had been betrayed.  God had compassion and promised one day a redeemer.  They wouldn’t live to see it.  Their life as they knew it was destroyed. Their memories would haunt them.   Life would be a pale shadow of what it was just yesterday.  But one day in a heavenly kingdom there would be healing because God promised Jesus would enter the garden and suffer there with us. 

My friend is in the garden.   He is passing through the late hours of Maundy Thursday into Friday.  He is now waiting for that final pronouncement that it is finished.  Your union is now dissolved.   I pray that rest comes for him on Saturday and an Easter with something new.  Its hard for him to see it right now.   The world is not a friendly garden all the time.  And people are people.  They are broken and they break one another.  And it’s a fairy tale that humpty dumpty gets put back together the same way after a great fall.  

Its like a fire.  You sense something is off.  You can smell the smoke but its a low smolder.  It can wait, it can be tolerated.  Then suddenly it bursts into flame and too late you find out someone was in the darkness throwing gasoline on it with impure motive.  Now it can happen that we burn down our lives by ourselves, but it can also happen that others commit a metaphorical arson and set our lives on fire to clear out room for what they want.  (Get someone's spouse, someone's job, someone's inheritance, just name your poison).  People say something good will come out of it.  Perhaps.  Sometimes something new and wonderful does rise out of the ashes: some new learning, some new opportunity, a new direction, a new path.  But sometimes to be honest it doesn't.  Sometimes what follows is as for Adam and Eve a pale shadow of what was.  People can do damage to the lives of others.   Life is interdependent and people have a great deal of impact on one another, more than we may be willing to admit.    The family grieving the loss of a loved one because a stranger chose to drink and drive, the affair that destroys a marriage and leaves wounds in the children, breaking into a widows home during the funeral and taking treasured keepsakes, someone works behind the scenes to destroy your reputation and career and you never work in the field of your passion again (again, name your poison).  Life is better if we think before we act.  God put those commandments in there about coveting other people's spouses, jobs, and other stuff because he knows how much hurt is caused when we cross boundaries and destroy other people's lives.  But it still happens.  Sometimes things change and there is no returning to Eden.  Sometimes Gethsemane is all that is left.  Sometimes reality is, well... real.  But Easter still comes.

Easter is real.  Heaven is real.  This world may not have answers.  This life for some may hold that crippling kind of pain that lingers and leaves scars even after it heals.  I think most people have some kind of scar.   But God has entered the garden with us.  Twice.   When humanity fell and when He came to save us. And He does save us.  Not the way our broken heart wants by  bringing it all back the way it was.  But rather through forgiveness and a promise that one day what we shall know will make all this fade in comparison. 

Even as Jesus prepared himself that night, the night of Maundy Thursday, the night of the Last Supper, the night of Holy Communion and unholy dissolution,  for that which was coming, (For I say unto you, that this that is written must yet be accomplished in me, And he was reckoned among the transgressors: for the things concerning me have an end. Luke 22:37) He still loved them.  He still loved them all.  Even as they grew so weary of it all and slept and left Jesus to deal with it alone, He loved them.  He suffered alone.  It hurt him, but He loved them. 

My friend feels very alone right now.  He knows his life is forever changed.  His partner chose a different path.  And he knows that it is what it is.  Jesus is with you my friend.  Jesus was there before you.  Jesus hasn’t abandoned you.  All the world may abandon.  Your family might abandon you.  Your spouse, your lover, your partner, your best friends all may abandon you for all kinds of reasons they know are right.  But Jesus will never ever abandon you.  Why?  Because it happened to Him first.